Louie Lentil’s Guide To Sophistication


For proper royal etiquette,
The fork goes on the right
In each sentence place a predicate.
And you might seem truly bright.

For wine and cheese, I beg you please
Always turn down your nose.
For current events regarding army tents
Say you’ll only read classic prose.

To dress just right, on the opera night,
A rented tux will do.
But please don’t snore if the scene’s a bore,
For that speaks poorly of you.

Finally, superficiality is security
Never speak it from the heart.
Surround yourself with imbeciles
And then you will seem smart.


- Louie Lentils


 

Passage

“Hold it right there,” said he who stares,
“Roll no more, be steady.
For beyond that door lie shock and awe
for which I doubt you’re ready.
I know that you have a task to do
And avoidance cannot be.
Still, take my advice and think it twice,
for it may help you to see.
Well, after all, you’re just a simple ball,”
thought the petrified poet, mistaken!

“For a mission serene as I am green
your orders are gladly taken”

“Don’t be naïve, or you’ll never achieve
of you what is expected.
Keep your morals straight or you’ll abate
Whenst your mind becomes infected.
Well then vacate here my little sphere
And obtain what I requested.
For danger’s by, the bird must fly,
No longer may you be nested!

“So off I go into a world I don’t know,
I’ll be rolling down the hall.
For after here, I shall not fear.
I am the Little Green Ball!”


- Louie Lentils

 

 

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